Sunday, May 14, 2017

Tom Terrific Schools The Tinseltown Nine : Tuesday, September 2nd, 1969


CIN 4, CHI 0  W-Merritt 10-14 L-Hands 17-10  HR-May(26) Bench(13)

HOU 5, STL 4  W-Griffin 9-12 L-Hoerner 9-7  Miller 1-out walk-off double.

NY 3, LA 0  W-Seaver 12-12 L-Moeller 11-8  

PHI 4, SD 3  W-Palmer 3-6 L-Baldschun 3-3  S-Wilson(12)

Your Impartial Goddess loves Tom.
Enter Tom Terrific to stop the madness! Tom Seaver schooled the dissipated,  coked-up, disease-ridden Tinseltown nine as your Impartial Goddess cheered wildly from the stands. Tom mowed down the Dodgers and was backed by a 2-run Tommie Agee triple, followed by a sac fly by Ed Kranepool. Seaver allowed just 2 hits until the 9th, when the Dodgers just couldn't help being annoying and loading the bases with two out, but that brought up Jeff "Burger Chef & Jeff" Torborg, who failed and ended the game. With Tom Haller injured and emergency backstop Ted Sizemore out of the game for a pinch hitter, he had to bat. Awww, too bad! Ha!

Miller turned on a hanging curve ball!
In Houston, the Cardinals jumped all over Tom Griffin, who seemed about to face the same sort of shellacking that the Redbirds handed out to Don Wilson on Monday. They took a 4-0 lead, but then Griffin righted the ship and started tossing shutout ball. The Astros got one back, and then sloppy fielding--3 errors!--allowed the game to be tied at 4. Up stepped Norm "Mrs. Miller" Miller, who promptly greeted Joel Hoerner with a walk-off double that scored pinch runner Hector Torres for the stirring win. Normal Norm then screeched his way through "My Way" in celebration!

Bill Hands, the scourge of the National League for most of the year, has now lost 6 of his last 9 decisions with his defeat at the hands of Cincinnati on Tuesday. A pair of two-run bombs did him in as Jim Merritt tossed the whitewash at Crosley.

Finally, in the all-important Battle Of The Basement, the Phillies ran their record against the Holy Men to 8-3 with a rare one-run win, 4-3. The Pods had scored a pair to tie the game late, but former Phillie Jack Baldschun was undone by a Nate Colbert error and the Quakers took the "W." After not notching any saves since July 15th, Billy Wilson has two in two days. Tom Hanks must be so pleased! At least the Phils can beat somebody, even if it is just the lowly Friars.
Take that, monk boy!

1 comment:

stevemryan said...

Reds Win, Cardinals lose. I'll take it!